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It had in fact delayed my retirement, because of Lois the business stayed challenging for another six months.By the time I got really bored I had been retired from the Sheriff’s department for thirteen months. In all honesty I wasn’t bored to tears, but I knew I was headed for that. With that in mind I began to plan for a soft landing.The first thing I did was to give Mike the stove man notice that at the end of ninety days I would be out of the business altogether. If he wished to go his own way sooner, I would be happy to see him go and wish him well. After ninety days I would be finished, period.“This has been a good year for us both. Why do you want to give it up,” he asked.“To be honest Mike, I’m getting bored. When I get bored, I get sloppy. Then it’s just a matter of time until I overlook something important. That will get me either a jail sentence or a bullet. We had a good run and made a few bucks. Since I made it a policy to never find your still site, you will still have. It was as close as we could come to the true union, the one inside us, in our minds. It isn’t possible for there to be greater pleasure than feeling your one true lifemate’s heat melt into your own. All in giving, no taking, just a cosmic union of flesh. The rest was day to day, tiny moments of just living, mingled with trying to please. We loved in dreams, so many times I would wake, his hand in mine, fresh from the touch of him, basking in the afterglow of just a memory. More sleep could come then, safe and secure, the best of all. Twenty plus years of living that, with just a few short weeks in the middle of pain. My fault, my error, my failure, that short period. Then the ending, nearly three long hard years of worry and fear, finally over. One is never ready. There were no children as a result of our unions, I was fertile, so was Ted. It simply didn’t happen, only God knows the answer to that. We would have welcomed but we also never really had a concern or even discussed it. My.
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